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20s· About 5 months before it loosenedI hated everyone — it turned out I was just unbearably tired
Sometimes 'I hate everyone' really means 'I'm tired of not being understood.'
Emotional state
Anger, irritation, isolation
What was underneath
Years of feeling unheard at home and work
What it looked like
- snapping at people
- wanting everyone to leave me alone
- constant irritation
- exhaustion
The darkest moment
A night I pushed away the one friend still texting me, then sat alone convinced everyone had given up.
The first thing that helped
That friend replied anyway: "You don't have to talk. I'll just stay on the line." We said nothing for twenty minutes.
What helped over time
- Started naming the feeling as 'tired' instead of 'hate'
- Let one person stay close without performing
- Short walks when the anger spiked
- Eventually saw a counselor through work
What did not help
- Forcing myself to 'be grateful'
- People telling me to just calm down
How long it took
About 5 months before it loosened
Where they are now
Still get irritable, but I can tell the difference now between hate and exhaustion.
Their path won't be exactly yours, and that's okay. You only need your own next small step.